Now I've been tagged

Justin tagged me, so here goes. I'm supposed to tell you 5 things you don't know about me. I don't know my audience, exactly, so some of you may already know all this stuff:

1. My mom says that when she decided to name me Moishe, she saw my name floating in the sky with rainbows and stars floating around. She didn't mention unicorns, but I sort of wish she had. My dad has a less drug-induced version of where my name came from, but I believe my mom.
   
2. When I was 17, I rode my bicycle from my parents' house in Massachusetts to Los Angeles. When I got home, I was skinny and bearded, and my little sister Mahala (who was 6) had no idea who I was. Apparently I scared the hell out of her by picking her up to hug her.
   
3. I met my wife at a poker game at a house in Olympia. The house was named Thelma's, after its previous (?) owner. This house had two incredible features. First, it had a "fire sculpture": the house overlooked Puget Sound and sticking up out of the mud and the water, about 100 feet off shore, were a bunch of pipes about 5 meters tall. Inside the house was a switch. Turning the switch would cause gas to flow through the pipes and an ignitor to fire on their tips. This created a truly awesome effect. Second: in the front yard of this house was a bathtub. Next to the bathtub was a pile of firewood. If you wanted a hot bath, you filled the tub with water (via a pail), piled the wood under the tub and lit it. The effect was like a cartoon-cannibal stew.
   
4. With my friends Ansel and Scott, I "stole" (maybe Ansel had permission? It's still unclear) Isaac Brock's shitter Honda motorcycle from a parking lot on Capitol Hill. We stuffed this thing into Scott's VW cargo bus, drove it to Oly, and put it in my garage, where it stayed for at least two years. When I moved out of my duplex, I abandoned the unloved motorcycle in the woods.
   
5. During the aforementioned bicycle trip, my traveling companions and I arrived in a town in Texas after a very long day, as the sun was setting. According to our map, this town should've had a grocery store, a campsite and even some people. It had none. So, we started looking around this weird abandoned town for a place to stay, and saw what looked like an abandoned building with an unlocked door. So... we opened the door, saw what looked like the interior of an abandoned bar. Why not sleep in an abandoned bar, right? I mean, if you're a bunch of scrawny east coast liberals and one weird Australian, what harm could possibly befall you in an abandoned bar in an abandoned town in Texas? So we started moving our crap in, and on our second trip outside we were confronted by a GIANT Native American dude, who asked if he could help us. We stammered out what we were doing, and he replied, "wait here". What the hell else were we gonna do, right? So wait we did, and giant Indian dude came back with a littler guy and a mean-looking pit bull and a GIANT CASE OF BEER. And a camp stove, and STEAK. And we fucking raged that abandoned bar, drinking beer and eating steak with the locals. I am no way clever enough to make that shit up, but if you don't believe me I have photographic proof. And, the best part: the dog's name was Asshole. It's all true.
   

Now, I tag Lindsey, Hosie, Steve, Steve, and Deonn. Special bonus: Dad